Friday, September 16, 2011

Unsolicited reminising

On several occasions in my life, OK often, people have told me that I take things "the wrong way".  That I "read into things too much".  This could very well be a glaring example of that or it could clearly illustrate my sentiments about know it all WAY better then you Moms.

Yesterday I stopped into Michaels craft store with my daughter while Noah was at school.  We browsed around for the better part of an hour and all the while my daughter, who is 18 months old, asked "whatha" "what's that" about every single object we passed.  By the time I got to the counter her continuous onslaughts of "whatha" had faded into the background of my head while I loaded up the counter with my goods.  The cashier starts smiling with that goofy "I would do it better then you" grin.  As I finished putting my stuff on the counter while constantly wrestling impulse items out of my daughters chubby little fingers the cashier looks at me and says, "Is she asking "what's that?".  Yes, I say.  She has been saying it the entire time we have been here.  She has been saying it the entire ride here.  She has been saying it for the entire morning before we left the house.  She has been saying it in my dreams at night.  The cashier looks at me and says, "you can always tell first time moms from moms that have multiple children".  Now I say, WHATHA?  "Yes when I had my first I answered them EVERY SINGLE TIME" she says to me.  "But I had twins so I was always a first time mom" she goes on to say.  Well good for you dear.  Are you saying that you never ignored a single request from your little darling twins?  Because I see that you are at work and not at home with those little bundles of joy.  You're also working at Michaels not on Wall Street.  I have an idea!  Go home and be with those little angels and keep up the good work answering ALL OF THEIR QUESTIONS.  Or better yet  MIND YOUR F-ING business and I will mind mine.

Now people did I take this the wrong way?  I didn't say anything nasty to her I just smiled and said the usual, "Wow twins? You must have been busy?"  and she gave me the "Oh I loved every minute of it" speech even though she could not have been a day over 35.  If she is all done raising them then they are in foster care.  This type of thing happens all the time when you go out with your kids.  It is said to the unsuspecting mother under the guise of reminiscing about their own parenting days or maybe as helpful tips meant to fix all your problems but all it succeeds in doing is making me want to rip your face off and then take my 400 pound diaper bag and beat you with it.  Alright I don't condone the violence but I seriously raged inside my head for a hour after I left.  Don't you think as a Mom we have it hard enough?  By the time I actually get to the store I have had to feed, bathe, clothe, and comfort 3 human beings.  I am lucky I am still awake never mind answering all my children's endless questions.  Lets leave the moms to their misery OK.  We feel shitty enough without your interjections.

Well that is my rant for Friday.  This weekend marks MY personal official start to Fall.  Apple picking.  I can't wait!  Have a good weekend everyone...and when you see a mother out with her children...keep your opinions to yourself.  :)


  1. I don't think you took it wrong at all. I think by talking about her twins she was inflating herself — and her ego — quite a lot.

    Not just that, but also trying to make you feel inferior. Likely because, yeah, she is working in a Michael's and you're a customer with a child, buying stuff — and something inside of her probably resents that.

  2. Hi Michelle! I was looking for bloggers in New Hampshire and came across your blog :) We're going to be moving there in a few weeks, and I'm so excited about apple picking too (you can't do that in the desert, LOL!).

  3. @Jen, I totally read way to much into things all the time but I left feeling like I should have been more attentive to my daughter and all I wanted was some craft supplies! Geesh motherhood can be a pain...
    @Amy, Welcome to New Hampshire!! It is wonderful here and what a great time to be moving to the northeast. The foliage will be beautiful when you arrive. Apple picking is my all time favorite family activity. Hope you enjoy all the seasons...even winter. ;)